I Am My Hair

I am my hair.

I know it's vain, but I must tell you now that when I was a little girl I had FANTASTIC hair. It was wispy and yet curly, the color of pale yellow mixed with white. Like my son, who had the same hair only slightly darker and curlier, people at the grocery were drawn to touch my hair when I was a little girl. They just couldn't help themselves. My hair was like an enchantment.

This power of my hair did not become evident to me until I was a teenager. I fought the curls in those days, though it mattered little in the humid bay area near Houston. I straightened with all my strength, but an hour later...poof. I was back to curly. As a drill team dancer in High School, I straightened AND THEN hot curled my hair. Now that was brilliant. But it didn't matter, as I said. One hour later and poof. Nonetheless, people loved my hair, and thus loved me.

In college, I eventually let my hair be free. Especially when I was playing Luciana in Comedy of Errors at Winedale. The cascading curls were perfect for any Renaissance female role, comedy or tragedy. People applauded me from the audience, but I knew it was for my hair. Bravo! Bravo! For Sherry's hair!

Last summer, before any of this cancer had made itself known to me, I noticed a picture Kirk took at Cap Rock State Park. It was a picture of just my hair. Kirk loves my hair. I swear he mentions it weekly. It's embarrassing, but true. My hair is SPLENDIFOROUS. I love it; Kirk loves it; the WORLD loves MY HAIR. And that has made all the difference.

But now I say goodbye to the hair that has defined me and I wonder if the world will still love me when I look like a Buddhist monk.* Only I won't look like a Buddhist monk. I'll look like a cancer patient. There won't be any hiding the cancer behind my hair any more. It'll be just my face--my round, chubby face. With my round, chubby face and no hair to dazzle them, will I still find love? For only my soul and spirit will be left in my eyes....hey, my eyes....that's it!

I AM my eyes....

*I will supposedly lose all my hair during the transplant AND it may not grow back as it is now.

Stay tuned for my upcoming photographic TRIBUTE TO MY HAIR.